Social Insecurity

You might be wondering how I am doing now that I have retired from the library.

After periods of guilt because I am not out there earning a paycheck, I have to admit that what I am doing now is far more important than what I was doing then, in the days when my primary responsibility was checking dvd's in and out and throwing books away.

It doesn't pay a whole lot less either ($0).

I am writing, and I am, for the most part enjoying it immensely.  I have my political blog and my personal blog.  After the Post and Courier awarded me the Golden Pen Award for my first letter to the editor about the thousands of books being tossed by the library, I felt reassured that I had done the right thing, by exposing this nastiness, and by quitting.

I am continuing to write letters to the Post and Courier, and occasional political pieces for the SC New Democrats, some of which they lose, and some of which they print.  I started a new blog specifically to feature the admirable women that are running for election in 2012.  And I am actually writing for one of them.

It's great to have an opinion, and not have people tell you you have overstepped your bounds by verbalizing it.  It is an amazing pleasure to be out of the workplace, after ten years of being a cog who was supposed to show up and shut up.

The problem is my insecurity as a writer.  When I get a compliment, I am tickled and proud, until I don't get praise for something, when I become -- let's not say "wracked" -- uneasy about my skills and others' opinions of me.

But it is and will continue to be a problem worth learning to overcome.